“Love Your Enemies”: Easier Said Than Done

This article talks about:

• Loving Your Neighbor vs. Loving Yourself
• Loving Enemies in Interpersonal Conflicts
• Everyday Challenges of Love

-By Elhanan ben-Avraham-

ואהבת לרעך כמוך -Leviticus 19:18.

These words spoken in Hebrew by Yeshua (aka Jesus) make for a fine and heartwarming Bible study, but may in fact be more challenging to realize when faced with the realities of life. First, it might be asked if we are commanded to love our "neighbor" (the actual Hebrew word used there is reah, which is friend or companion, rather than ‘neighbor’) as we love ourselves. Can one truly love another if one does not have a healthy love for oneself? Whereas if one is filled with self-disdain, might that love for another be instead rather an unhealthy co-dependency stained by the toxicity of that self-hatred?

To love our enemies also makes for a fine Bible study—until one actually has a real enemy. If one in reality despises a declared enemy who is out to destroy you, acting as if you love him may be flavored with insincerity and may be felt by your adversary as nothing but hypocrisy. On the other hand, in an interpersonal intracommunal relationship of conflict or heated debate, even acting that out may quiet the negative feelings for both parties and thus create a new reality that can lead to a peaceful resolution and restored friendship.

In a war or criminal situation, rather than an interpersonal relationship, when enemies have set forth to kill and destroy, then the words of Yeshua become even more difficult to apply. Then it may become one’s job as a soldier or officer of the law to risk one’s life in taking another’s in order to protect one’s family or nation.

Many sincere Christians, including the famed Sergeant York in World War 1, were obliged to face an enemy and kill, or be killed, in combat. It was also true for those who stormed the Normandy beaches in order to defeat the evil of Nazism. That has often been the fulfillment of another of Yeshua’s sayings, "There is no greater love than laying one’s life down for another," which may be the case in taking up arms to defend one’s family or nation. In the Ten Commandments, it is not written, ‘You shall not kill,’ but ‘You shall not murder, a clear distinction in Hebrew.

The Torah, which is also endorsed by Yeshua (Matthew 5:17–19), directs us to first attempt to make peace with our adversaries before engaging in war (Deuteronomy 20:10). There are other admonitions and examples of doing good to enemies in the books of the Torah, including Exodus 23:4-5, 32:35, Romans 12:19, and Proverbs 25:21–22: "If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.  In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you." As an example, this is what Elisha practiced with the captured Assyrians (2 Kings 6:21–23). Rather than being entirely revolutionary, Yeshua’s words were built upon these Torah passages.

Yeshua referred several times to actual war and weapons thereof, once in the parable of the king that goes out to war, first considering if he has enough forces to win, and another time telling his disciples to sell their cloaks and purchase swords (presumably not for peeling oranges). He also said that there would continue to be wars and rumors of wars, which we continue to witness to this day. Therefore, God’s people must carefully weigh the words of the Messiah and consider how they might apply to current situations until that day comes when swords are beaten into plowshares, and nations learn war no more (Isaiah 2).

Meanwhile, loving one’s own friends and family (even fellow believers with whom one may be disappointed), forgiving them, and attempting to reconcile with them when feelings are hurt, is often a challenge enough to tax our spiritual resources and faith.

"By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one to another."

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Elhanan ben-Avraham, born in 1945, is a professional artist, poet, writer, father of two, and grandfather of four, and he has been living in Israel since 1979. He has served in the IDF, taught the Bible internationally, published five illustrated books of poetry, painted two large Biblical murals in public buildings in Jerusalem, and most recently produced THE JERUSALEM ILLUSTRATED BIBLE, among many other works. He and his wife live in a quiet village in the Mountains of Judah.