Gary Webster: Tammuz - What My Father Gave Me [2025/5785]

Shalom from Jerusalem, the truly eternal city.

Tonight begins the month of Tammuz. The hot, hazy days of summer have started. Here in Israel, the grass has turned brown and there is no rain. However, our Heavenly Father is providing for us and protecting us.

I gave this talk the title: "What My Dad Gave Me."
Why? Several weeks ago in North America, and in some other countries around the world, fathers were remembered. I would like to honor those dads who did a good job of fathering.

My dad gave me a strong work ethic. He went to work every week. He was never late and always did his best.
My dad gave me a love for reading. He was always reading — mostly newspapers and periodicals — and he was always informed.
My dad gave me an example of meekness. Even when people took advantage of him, he did not get angry or retaliate.
My dad gave me an abiding trust in the faithfulness of God. He truly believed that God would provide his every need and open doors for work and provision.
My dad gave me my bald head.

Suppose my dad had not been around to give me any of these things. Would I have become the man I am today? I doubt it.

In his book The Forgotten Father, Tom Smail writes:

"For me, a father means somebody who is able to regulate the life of his children from a center outside of themselves, to pull them toward wholeness, to accustom them to obedience, and so to offer them security."

He continues:

"I am well aware that the lack of such a father is not the worst thing that can happen; much more harmful is the presence of a father who fails to function as such—who either abdicates in weakness or unconcern, or dominates in his own interests without sympathy or understanding for his children."

What kind of father did you have?
Was he absent?
Did he abandon you and your mother?
Was he abusive — verbally, physically, or even sexually?

You may be thinking, "Gary, you're bringing up emotions and memories I’ve tried to suppress."
Anger, hatred, and disgust might be popping into your mind.
Why?

Because the kind of father we had has shaped the image we hold of our Heavenly Father.
That image may be warped and twisted, or it may be close to the truth — but it affects how we relate to God.

Our Heavenly Father loves us unconditionally and desires a real relationship with us.

But:
How can a child who hates their earthly father love their Heavenly Father "with all their heart, mind, and soul?"

How can someone afraid of their father draw near to God?
How can a child abandoned by a parent believe God when He says, "I will never leave you nor forsake you"?

Is there hope for healing and restoration? Absolutely.
As the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:17:

"If anyone is in Christ, a new creation has come. The old is gone, and the new is here."

Healing can come — but it takes time.

There is hope for us dads who have messed up, too.

Romans 12 says we can be transformed by the renewing of our minds.
Ezekiel 36:26–27 tells us:

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you. I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.
I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them."

Those of us who are fathers could only emulate what we saw — or didn’t see — our fathers do.
You’ve heard the phrase: "Like father, like son."
We did the best we could. But can we do better? Definitely.

The Bible holds out hope for us to become better fathers.

In Luke 15, beginning in verse 11, Yeshua tells the parable of the Prodigal Son:

"There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.
Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country, and squandered his wealth in wild living.
After he had spent everything, a severe famine arose, and he began to be in need. So he hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to feed pigs. He longed to eat the pods the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.
When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s servants have food to spare, and here I am starving! I’ll go back and say: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’
So he got up and went to his father.
But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion. He ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.
The son said, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I’m not worthy to be called your son.’
But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe, a ring for his finger, sandals for his feet. Kill the fattened calf. Let’s celebrate! For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’
Meanwhile, the older son heard the celebration. He became angry and refused to go in.
The father came out and pleaded with him, but he said, ‘All these years I’ve served you, yet you never gave me even a goat to celebrate. But this son of yours returns after wasting your property, and you celebrate him?’
‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again—he was lost and is found.’"

In his book The Return of the Prodigal Son, Henri Nouwen describes two key traits of a godly father: unconditional love, and compassion for the wayward child.

Do we truly love our children unconditionally — or do they have to earn our love?

If you feel distant from your children today, it can change.
By the grace of God, we can learn to love the way our Father loves us.

Apologize for the wounds we’ve caused.
Ask for permission to be part of their lives again.
If they let us in, we can create new and better memories.

The second trait is compassion — a deep sympathy for others' suffering.

Nouwen writes:
"I can see three ways to truly compassionate fatherhood: grief, forgiveness, and generosity."

Grief allows the pain of the world — including our own — to pierce our hearts and move us to tears.
Forgiveness means letting go of the hurt and choosing restoration, even when it’s hard.
Generosity pours out everything for the sake of our children — holding nothing back.

This is a tall order.
But don’t our children deserve to see us at our very best?

Don’t we want healthy relationships with our children… and our grandchildren?

May this new month be the beginning of a new you.
A new me.
Rosh Chodesh Sameach.

Gary Webster: Tammuz - Finish the race! [2024/5784]

Read the transcript below, or watch a video of the teaching by Gary Webster.

Shalom from Jerusalem, the city of the great king! Tonight begins the month of Tamuz. Summer has arrived, for those of us in the northern hemisphere. Visits to the pool or the beach are in order; turning on the air conditioning is a must if you can afford it. I'm not complaining, though, because I prefer the heat to the cold any day.

If you've been following the news like I have, there's not much good news in the world. You might want to, like the turtle, put your head into your shell, or like this ostrich, bury your head in the sand. It won't change the reality, but at least you won't have to deal with it. I wish to encourage you tonight. A big event is going to happen next month; it will take place in Paris, France. That's right, the 2024 Summer Olympics! The Parisians are putting the finishing touches on the arenas and venues. The spectators have made their reservations. 10,000 world-class athletes are itching to get the show on the road. The Olympics will be a welcome distraction from all the sadness in the world. My favorite event is track and field; the relay races get me excited! You're watching first-class athletes doing their very best. There will be the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. How would you feel if you were going to Paris to watch the events? How would you feel if you were going to compete? Excited, no doubt? As disciples of Yeshua, we can still feel that excitement. We are in a race of our own, figuratively speaking; and you don't need legs to run this race. This is a spiritual race! Read Hebrews 12:1 and 2 along with me:

"Therefore, we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus or Yeshua, the author and finisher of our faith."

If you've been born from above by God's spirit, you are in this race. Like the Olympians who are coming to Paris, we are being watched by many spectators. Who are they? That, therefore, in verse one refers you and me back to chapter 11 of Hebrews. They're all the saints from Adam on down through the ages; they are cheering us on! I titled this talk "Finish the Race Well." Three things are needed to finish well. First, proper equipment. Have you ever seen a runner wearing an overcoat and boots? No, they're almost naked. In Greek and Roman times, athletes competed in the nude, modern athletes and their audiences have a more modest attitude. All the runners wear light clothing. They have sturdy but light shoes. They do not want to be carrying anything that will slow them down. What about you? What about me? Are we carrying "weights" that are slowing down our spiritual progress? Anger, grudges, bitterness? Are we allowing sins to linger in our lives that can trip us up? Pride, lust, envy? If we want to finish well, well run light! Second, you have to pace yourself. This race you and I are in is not a sprint; it is a marathon. If you go out too fast, then there's not enough juice left to finish strong. If you go too slow, then you'll miss out on the prize. You can stumble while running the marathon and still win; you will lose in a sprint if you stumble. Finish well! Lastly, if you wish to finish well, you must stay focused. The one thought in the runner's mind is getting to the finish line. Their eyes are looking ahead; they don't look to the side or behind. Those actions will throw off your stride! Likewise, we must stay focused on Yeshua. The distractions of this world will cause us to stumble and even make us want to give up.

At this point, I want to share a story about an Olympic runner; his name is Derek Redmond. You might remember him. In 1996, he was in the 400-meter finals. He got off to a good start, and then about 250 meters into the race, he drew up with a hamstring pull. He had torn his hamstring. There's no way he could finish the race, he drew up with a hamstring pull. He had torn his hamstring. There's no way he could finish the race, but his dad came from the stands, put his arm over his, his arms under Derek or Derek's hands over his shoulders, and they limped together to the finish line. That's a very encouraging story of perseverance! Keep your eyes forward; the cloud of witnesses is cheering you on! Like Paul may have said of you, "I have finished the race!" Rosh chodesh samech.